laying under the table...

and dreaming.
I went to see Jackie and Carter play at the Mad Hatter last night. They were incredible! After having a sightsinging test, a writing theory midterm, and a major scholarship audition, as well as being called into work for 2.5 hours last night, I was ready for a break. The show was more than I had expected, which is saying a lot because I've known them both for a while and heard them play multiple times. The Mad Hatter is such an amazing place--full of good people and good vibes.

Jackie sang a cover of "Red Right Ankle" by The Decemberists, and I completely fell in love with it. The lyrics are:

This is the story of your red right ankle
And how it came to meet your leg
And how the muscle bone and sinews tangled
And how the skin was softly shed
And how it whispered,"Oh, adhere to me for we are bound by symmetry
And whatever differences our lives have been
We together make a limb"
This is the story of your red right ankle

This is the story of your gypsy uncle
You never knew cause he was dead
And how his face was carved an ripped with wrinkles
In the picture in your head
And remember how you found the key
To his hide-out in the Pyrenees,
But you wanted to keep his secret safe,
So you threw the key away?
This is the story of your gypsy uncle

This is the story of the boys who loved you
Who love you now and loved you then
And some were sweet and some were cold and snuffed you
And some just layed around in bed
And some, they crumbled you straight to your knees
Did it cruel, did it tenderly
Some they crawled their way into your heart
To rend your ventricles apart
This is the story of the boys who loved you
This is the story of your red right ankle

During the concert, I went into my own little world, and for the first time, found some peace. Something about the acoustic guitar music and the atmosphere allowed me to completely relax and reflect on things. This song struck me especially for some reason. Jackie's voice was so soothing and perfect, and the lyrics made me stop and think. It was one of those things where life just felt good and right. Some stars must have aligned or something.


Carter's set was really powerful, too. His voice and music have developed so much since I first met him. His music always resonates with me, and it especially did last night. He even played Complimentary and told everyone the story about it. I felt so special...it made my night and I'd go so far as to say week. You know how there are some people in life that just get you? Carter's a kindred spirit...I hope he and I are friends always.


So...maybe I should have said this at the beginning, but I'll take the more unorganized approach and run with it--I started this blog because 1) Nikki and Heather did! and 2) I'm freaking addicted to blogging. I like having a new one. It gives me hope that I'll have good things to write about in the future. Today seems to be a defining day for me, so I figured it was as good of a time as any to do it.

I spent time looking at Facebook pictures today and realizing that in the past semester, I've lost myself in a sea of deadlines, music major craziness, and personal problems. I'm moving on from them. I'm going to stop beating myself up over things and start just living the best life I know how to live...and I'm going to let that be enough. I liked myself before this semester. I'm ready to love myself again...today is the day it starts.

Heather and Nikki--I love you both so much! :) I'm looking forward to many happy blogging moments with you both! <3

Here's to a new blog and a new outlook on life! Sad? Maybe. Truthful? YES. And it's working.

<--P.S. If there were a picture to describe how I feel or how I want to feel, it's this one. It was taken by one of my swimmers about two summers ago while I was rotating off the stand. I like my long hair. I can't wait for summer again. :) I'm a summer kid. I love lifeguarding. I love the pool. And I love the way I felt when this picture was taken. Here's to finding that girl again.